I don’t know a woman out there that doesn’t adore Valentine’s Day.
For me it meant everything because my husband proposed the day before so I woke up on Valentine ’s Day back in 1998 the happiest girl in the world.
Now with each passing year for us it still holds such magic. We both go out of our way to make the other ones feel like the most loved person on earth!
Ladies this is your chance to make your husband feel like a king. It does take a little planning, the baby sitter is coming and unfortunately it falls on a Tuesday but that’s okay dinner reservations are made at our favorite spot. By the time we get home my little ones will be fast asleep and we can turn on the fire in our bedroom light some scented candles turn on some mood music and well you know what comes next!
So what are you doing this year for your hubby or boyfriend? If you are interested in cooking a great meal in I have some incredible recipes that you will love on my site including desserts that will get you everything you want!
Let’s not forget the kids. This year I am baking cupcakes and heading over to their school for the class Valentine’s day party. My kids will have fun helping me bake them of course and I made up special Valentines bags filled with love!
Whatever you decide, it’s certainly not about spending money. Just use your imagination to guide you and remember it only comes once a year! Make this day one that you and your loved ones will remember!
XOXO
Tara Brooke
It seems like every birthday comes a little faster than we would like. But since we certainly can’t change it I decided a long time ago never to allow it to bother me. After all as long as you are happy, healthy and have love in your life becoming another year older shouldn’t matter!
Frankly I am really proud of my age and I try to take these moments to allow myself to feel good about my accomplishments. We are always working hard to reach our goals and sometimes we just don’t celebrate what we accomplish so birthdays are really the perfect time to give yourself a pat on the back!
My day started out with early morning cuddles from my two favorite people on earth, my kids.
My husband had taken me over the weekend away to our favorite resort for a much needed couples getaway were we spent the day at the spa and by the pool relaxing and enjoying!
The night of my birthday Jason and the kids surprised me with decorating our breakfast room in all pink, mine and my daughters favorite color. He made a beautiful dinner and the cake was stunning!
Then they surprised me with breakfast with a little help from my handsome husband of course
Needless to say I was feeling the love. Jason made a special video for me of the kids sharing what they loved most about mommy wow you can’t put a price tag on that gift! All in all it was a magical birthday!
Here’s wishing that your special day and every day that follows be filled with Love, Health, hugs, kisses and happiness!
XOXO
Tara Brooke
Over the summer I paid special attention to simply having fun! With my twins, like all children, they completely live in the moment and I decided to do the same. We went Jet Skiing, Rock climbing, had tickle time at the park, feed the ducks at least 3 times a week, went to Disneyland, Sea world, and we had Halloween in Maui (Hawaii) it was an amazing summer and one that I will always remember! Fun to be honest can be had every day at any given time you certainly don’t have to fly to Hawaii to have it and you don’t have to spend money all the time as well just like happiness, FUN is a choice!
Like every parent out there I also have times when I feel overwhelmed by raising young children. I decided long ago that I was going to raise my kids without not a nanny! I made the decision to only have the number of kids that I really felt I could personally handle and for us that number was 2 and since we have boy/girl twins it was perfect for us! Now with that said let me say that I am not against help if you are a working mother! I also don’t think there is anything wrong with taking time away from your kids for yourself and your husband. I have a great baby sitter and I count on her to help me when I need her. However I don’t count on her to raise my kids there is a huge difference. I never wanted to look back and think wow I never got up with my kids, put them down at night read stories to them gave them baths all of these things that are all part of parenting. I had help the first year with my twins that I absolutely had to have but after that it’s been my husband and I enjoying it all and sometimes pushing through the rough days. I am far from perfect and when I write all of my blogs I always discuss things that are going on in my life and I use my words as a reminder to myself as well.
Just like you there are good days and bad days high’s and low’s but I also realize that every day that passes by my kids are bigger and become more independent so I try to enjoy every day and encourage myself to have FUN!
Make sure that you are spending a good portion of your day laughing and try to let things slide if you can. I am not talking about your daily routine or allowing your kids to completely slack off but really they are children and they will get into things You can decide which battles to win and which ones to let go!. Remember this is YOUR life and these are your moments to enjoy it won’t mean that things are perfect all the time but you can find joy in even the smallest moments so look for them every day! Another was to instantly feel better and have more fun is to do something for others. Instantly you feel good about yourself. Below are a list of affirmations that you can say out loud every day to yourself when you are getting ready. The more you say them the more you will believe them and the happier you will feel. Once you feel happy then you are able to relax and have FUN!
As we now set our sights on the Holidays let’s all choose to have fun, not stress out about the little things and simply enjoy yourself. If you are one of the millions of Americans that has been hit hard financially and you are having a more difficult time staying happy and allowing yourself to have fun just know one thing this time will pass. I completely understand where you are at because I have experienced it in my life but the good news is you can still choose to be happy and work hard to rebuild. You are certainly not alone and with the New Year just around the corner I would encourage you to start building up the WISH LIST and set your goals high for what you plan to accomplish in the New Year! You can do it!
Blessing’s to you all!
Your daily Affirmation’s:
1.I love myself
2.I am a good person
3.People like me
4.Great opportunity’s come to me everyday
5.I am healthy and happy
6.I am living in total abundance
7.I am in the best shape of my life
Note:
The key here is to understand that you are amazing that you have great strength within you. The idea is not to be perfect you will never reach perfection, none of us will thank goodness because what would we have to build towards once we reached that?
The idea is to be your BEST to strive for a higher standard. You can either make things happen or watch others make things happen.
I believe in you shoot for the moon you really do have everything to gain and nothing to lose if you simply BELIEVE and take ACTION
This such an important issue with so many bullies out there let’s get started! There are times throughout our life where unfortunately we will suffer verbal attacks, backstabbing and jabs made at our expense. When this happens here are some ways to handle it and get through it as the champion! Topic’s like this take me back to high school but BELIEVE me it happens all the time with people that should know better!
Let’s say for example you hear someone is talking about you behind your back and you confront them about it. It’s always best to approach these things as positively as possible by saying something like, “I wanted to reach out to you because I heard some things that I need to talk to you about regarding me and I was really confused about it. Can we talk”?
Now here’s the tricky part, the person will do one of two things depending on how mature they are.
The first thing they may say is, “Yes I would like to talk with you. There are some things bothering me let’s talk about it.” This may be their opportunity to clarify what is bothering them, or they may become incredibly defensive and lash out at you. If you are fortunate to have the first option happen, good for you, try to listen openly at their complaint. Be accountable if there are real issues, maybe you were unaware of how they may have perceived something you said and now you can explain what you meant. Try your best to work it out. There are always times when things are misunderstood and once people realize that then you can happily move forward (if you both approach it right).
But what if you get the second option and you are attacked, how do you handle it? Honestly it’s in all of us to retreat and then strike back. Normally when we do this we hit back harder than they do for self preservation, but when we do this it totally allows them to say “see I told you she was like this”. The best way to handle a loose cannon is to simply allow them to explode. All that does is shine’s a light on all of their issues and negativity and others will see it and know who is really to blame.
You really don’t have to do a lot when a person attacks you, even if they feel justified. It’s also their responsibility to handle whatever issue, or issues, that they have in the right manor. If they don’t you have every right to pity them and realize that they are simply not evolved yet. Believe me when I say people act out in cruel, mean and viscous ways. You should actually feel sorry for them because they are about to FALL hard.
People can’t walk through life acting like this and not think they will at some point suffer the karma back. It’s a universal law!
I like to simply remind myself that this type of act usually comes from a very unhappy person that may suffer from depression. (Which is real and those people need to seek professional help.) They are normally looking for someone else to blame for their own lack of confidence and happiness.
But again, if you are innocent and feel violated by this do what I do and simply cut them out of your life forever and move on. Allow yourself to feel upset, possibly write a letter to them that you never mail telling them everything you feel. Never harbor anger or resentment in your body, get it out and once you do move on!
Once you are able to see that these issues are really lessons that they will be accountable for, it makes it easy to realize it has nothing to do with you. It then becomes easier to let it go and not think about it, believe me!
Remember to try and treat others how you would want to be treated. If someone is hurting you, get away from them! Decide that you are not going to put yourself in a position where another person can try to make you feel bad about their issues. Now if you did do something that was taken the wrong way, be an adult and try your best to explain how you really meant it. They can either except that as the truth or they won’t. Either way you are showing them that you are the bigger person, acting in kindness. If they get nasty cut off all forms of communication with them and never look back.
It’s important to understand that not everyone is going to like us all the time. Maybe we remind them of someone else that hurt them in the past. Maybe they are jealous and insecure and when we are around they just don’t feel important. Again its their issue not yours. You practice being the best you can be and you will find yourself with loving and caring people in your corner that are there because they love who you are and for no other reason. It is sometimes easier said than done, but if you do this it will become easier and you become even more powerful and in control. Remember that nothing has any meaning except the meaning you give it!
So keep your chin up and continue to live your life to the fullest, letting your light shine as bright as possible. The ones in the dark will just have to work it out for themselves!
A final important note!
If you happen to be a student and you are being bullied, it is very important that you go to an adult that you trust and tell them about it. You need to know that you can gain power over the situation and move on from it. Don’t feel ashamed or embarrassed by it. There are people out there that are mean and you never have to hurt yourself in order to deal with that pain. It doesn’t matter who it is. Even if it’s a parent, sibling or a family member, never allow yourself to be bullied or abused. You can seek out help. If you are being bullied at school, tell someone. Don’t worry what other kids may think. Things will pass and you can get through it. Please reach out for help if you need it!
So here you are having what you think is a great date. In fact you know that you had a good time and are sure that he did too, but for whatever reason he never called you back for a second date.
If I was at the table I could tell you in about 10 minutes or less why this may or may not happen. But since I can’t be there to sit in our your date, which by the way I would LOVE (How fun would that be?), I have decided to write this quick post.
The most important thing to remember is it’s not so much about what you look like, although living here in the OC it may be LOL, truthfully it’s more about how a man feels when he is around you. Does he feel attractive, funny, charming? Do you laugh at his jokes and make him feel important? That really is the bottom line. It really all boils down to his ego, I hate to say it. The women that genuinely make him feel great will be the ones that “Rule his world”
This is also as important once you are married so don’t forget that!
So use this as a gentle reminder when you are out on a date make a conscious choice to not have the entire conversation revolve around you and please don’t start talking about your Ex and all things you hated about him. Try not to discuss all your problems. If you do he will not walk but RUN
This doesn’t mean that if for some reason he decided to bring up your ex that you can’t talk about it, but this is my suggestion, keep it brief and don’t bash him. It’s easier to say yes we had a great time while the relationship lasted but in the end we just weren’t right for each other. It’s classy and it shows him that you are confident and he will admire that you are not throwing the ex under the bus. The less you say about your ex the better. That way it’s clear to him, if in fact he is interested in you, that you no longer carry feeling’s for the ex and he is a non-issue. I would also tread lightly on asking too many questions about his ex. Some girls become a little obsessed with finding out all they can. The important thing to remember ladies is that it’s his “EX” they are no longer together so move on, quit reminding him of her.
I also think it’s really important to allow the man to hunt for you. This is what men do, they LOVE the hunt. Don’t always be so available for him in the beginning. Allow him to chase you and have fun with it. I am by no means suggesting that you play games or treat him poorly, just allow him to do what guys do best. HUNT Take your time and have fun building a relationship.
Hi Ladies,
Over the summer I have had the opportunity to be around lots of friends, some single, some married, some men and some women. They all seemed to have one thing in common and that was that there is a NAG amongst them. Now some of them are men that are being nagged and yes you guessed it others are actually the Nags themselves.
I wanted to write about this because I love my girls and I really think that many of these women don’t really know that they are doing it. I am just throwing it out there if you read this and relate to it ladies then GREAT, let it be a gentle reminder that “Nobody Like’s a NAG”
I am doing this for you.
Here’s the thing: we women like to control a lot and I think that in terms of managing multiple things at once we ROCK. Because we rock we tend to find fault in the guy’s when they fall behind on the tasks that are important to us, and that’s where the nagging begins.
I must tell you that from a Male’s prospective if you are dating and he realizes that you fall into this category frequently it will most likely be a deal breaker in his mind and it could be the end.
If you are married this is even worse because you can only kick the dog so to speak (no pun intended) for so long before he either bites’ you back or up and leaves. People cannot take this for long periods of time. And really who wants to be that person making another human being and especially one that you love feel bad.
Relationships are meant to be nurtured and cared for. Like a beautiful garden they take time, love, patience and gentle care to reach a full bloom.
If you know that right now I am talking to you then own it and decide today to STOP. There are things that you can do to work through these issues. Maybe it’s so bread into you because you grew up with a nagging mother who nagged her husband all the time so it’s like second nature. Whatever the reason it doesn’t matter!
People ask my husband and I all the time what’s our “secret” to having a wonderful relationship we are going on 14 years now and we have TWINS! I have to tell you there are several things we do. First of all we NEVER put each other down EVER, we don’t pick at each others faults or areas of weakness ( and we all have them folks, no one is perfect) We make time for each other first and foremost even before the kids because we know that if we are happy then our family is happy and together! Believe me our kids our one of the most important things to us and I make sure they get everything they need love, time, nurturing and a schedule that will allow them to thrive. I make it a point to connect and play with my kids when we are together but being a couple is first on the list it has to be! We make sure that we are connecting and having GREAT sex is a HUGE part of that. You have to have this to be fulfilled if this in not happening in your relationship something is wrong or getting stale and you need to SPICE it up!
My husband allows me to make mistakes without rubbing them in my face and I do the same. We build each other up never tearing each other down. Because I love him I never want to make him feel bad or hurt his feelings. When we were married I remember him saying something very profound to me he said “I will always love you and take care of you just always love me and be KIND to me. WOW be Kind out of all the things that he could have said he said be kind. That showed me how incredibly important it is to make your partner feel good and that means you have to get rid of the nagging once and for all.
Look inside yourself and see where this form of anger is coming from. Be honest with yourself its okay to admit that you are not perfect. Just write about it in a journal and begin to work on it. You may be with a man that seems to take it and you know full well that his is looking the other way maybe you like the control you think it gives you but in the end you won’t win.
There will be a breaking point for him because he is human. Try to let things roll if you find yourself getting steamed up about something that’s minor make the decision in that moment to say : honey I love you” and walk away. Once you verbally say the word LOVE it really does make you feel better almost instantly. You may really be upset and you may be right but if it’s hurting him then ultimately it’s hurting you both.
My goal with my Blog is to help you in all the ways I can. I try to provide you with the things I have done that work for me as well as the things I haven’t done right so they could serve as a pre warning of what not to do. Take it or leave it really it’s just my opinion. After years of watching friends marriages come and go I can tell you that one of the major reasons for divorce is the lack of respect between two people. Never forget that you married this person because you love him always keep that love centered in your mind. Lastly saying you are sorry and owning up to this behavior can have a huge impact on him in a positive way. You don’t need to grovel a simple” I’m sorry and I know I really need to work on this and I am committed to changing it because I don’t like it either” will do.
Good Luck girls I wish you all the best of luck in Love!
Hugs,
Tara Brooke
Hi Everyone,
Okay here is something to try. For years my husband and I worked out together as well as took daily walks. I have to tell you it has been amazing for us. There are certain things that you can do for your marriage that you may not be thinking of that really help you stay connected and totally into your partner. The most important thing that you can be doing as a couple is HAVING SEX
It is the simple truth and if you are not into it or making time for it your marriage will suffer. This is really hard for some women to hear but it’s the absolute truth. Your husband wants sex and desire’s sex and you should be making sure that this is top of the list. And the truth is you should want it too. The bond only continues to grow over time if you are finding new ways to enjoy one another in the bedroom.
Now, this blog is not about sex. That is really all I am going to say about the issue. This blog is about working out together and just doing that can actually increase your desire to have sex!
You will create a deeper bond if you make the time to work out together even if it’s a daily brisk walk or jog. You are spending quality time together and working out. How much better can it get?
Remember that while you are working out your body is producing endorphins, chemicals in the brain that evoke feelings of happiness and reduce stress. Get with your partner today and challenge each other to make it a Priority to work out together. Believe me if you start this for 30 days it can have the most amazing impact on your relationship as well as your body. Decide that you are going to get in shape, eat healthier and have more SEX
The things that motivate me in my life are my family and I know in my heart that as long as my husband and I are happy and thriving I can give my family what they deserve. The minute that I stop caring about his needs and he doesn’t make my needs top of his list then the family unit will suffer. Don’t allow that to happen. If you are one of the millions of women that work and have kids then now is the time to reassess your schedule and look to find ways to cut out some activities or rearrange things. Usually when things start to get stale it just means you need to mix it up. If you feel you need a recharge in the bedroom then take a night away with your husband at a great hotel. Get a couple’s message, lounge by the pool, have amazing sex and go out for an incredible dinner. Top that off with sleeping in and breakfast in bed and you have the makings of a new fresh start. Remember you can’t stop caring and you have to always look for ways to “Keep it Hot”. So take my advice on this one and start a new work out program with your man. Mix it up and keep him top of the list. Believe me if he sees you doing this he will do the same.
Have fun
Tara Brooke
Hi Ladies,
We are now officially at the half way point of summer.
If you are like me you are trying to find every way possible to squeeze in a few extra trips and special moments with the family before school starts back up. I am finding joy and really reminding myself that when I am with my kids I need to really focus on connecting with them. Not just being with them but truly making the connection that they deserve.
My husband and I love to create rituals with the kids so they can rely on special times together. For example we are starting to take them to Hawaii at the same time yearly. They absolutely love it and talk about it all year until it’s time to go. They know that weekends are going to be our special family breakfast time and they love knowing that Sunday’s are spent at church and in the summer swimming in the pool with their cousin Katie. They love knowing that we will take picnic lunches several times a week at the park or even the beach.We want them to begin to collect beautiful memories of our time together especially during these early years. There are so many ways to spend special moments with your family.
Try taking them out during the day whenever you can for walks or watching them ride their bikes and if you are like me then they may be learning to ride their scooters. My kids spend a few days at camp during the week just to break it up and see their friends even though they are 3 and a half they love their friends and since they are twins it gives them a chance to see other kids not just one another.
My husband and I are very blessed to work from home so we can set our own schedules We make it a priority to be with them when they are home we go to the park, out front sometimes we like to go to the lake and feed the ducks just being together. I allow my kids to be with me helping me in the kitchen every night so they can watch and learn. I set up things that they can do and I watch how proud they are to help. It’s really sweet. We try to have dinner every night together and talk about how our day went what we learned. We are always showing them that there is open communication in our family and that it’s a safe and loving environment where they can flourish.
In today’s busy world I feel that it’s especially important to slow down with my kids and enjoy the little things. Getting them out of the house maybe going to the mall not necessarily to buy something but just walk around and be together as a family. Go out to lunch and continue to teach them the importance of how to act correctly at a restaurant. Even though my kids are only 3 they are learning this now but believe me table edict needs to be refreshed at every age it seems. My kids are in swimming and have been since they were 6 months old. We felt it was really important to put them in and get them pool safe as soon as possible since we have a pool. Now they are on the swim team they LOVE it. If it was up to them they would be in the pool for 6 hours a day. They also take gymnastics one day a week just to burn off the added energy they have. I think it’s so important to allow them to take classes if you can afford it just to see what they like. I don’t think it’s a good idea to over load your kids with activity’s either but one or two is always good. I am not into allowing my kids to sit in front of the TV for hours on end. I would much rather be outside with them watching them learn or just playing together.
I also always try to get down and play with them on the floor. My daughter will say “mommy do you want to play with me” and I always try to say yes if I can. I want to make sure to enjoy those moments with her because I know the day will come when she stops asking and she just wants her friends to play with or hang out with. My son as well I have no problem pretending to be a dinosaur with my little man.
My husband and I decided that 2 kids are perfect for us. This is totally a decision that is personnel to every individual a lot of couples out there want larger family’s and I think it’s totally about what you want. The way we see is that my husband and I love having two because we are not outnumbered and can totally care for them. Except the date night when we have a baby sitter we are the ones that do the primary care for our kids and for us that is important, that’s not to say that the first year that my twins were born I didn’t have help because I did and I make no apologies for it, I needed it and I was very thankful to have it. But now I love the intimacy of our family of four we are so connected and we have time for their individual needs as well as our time together as husband and wife. Plus I have time for myself which helps make me a better mother and wife all around.
Some people think that you can’t create balance and I don’t believe that. I feel it’s really important to make the right decisions to really know what you are capable of maintaining in your life, in your marriage, finances and daily stress levels sometimes we make decisions that simple add TONS of stress to our lives when we really didn’t have to.
Now again everyone is different and each person has a different threshold my point is really to know what that is for your family and being on the same page as a couple is key. Well I think I have said enough I hope you enjoy your last month of summer and that this blog serves as a gentle reminder to enjoy the moments and slow down just a bit.
Here’s to you and your family!
Many Blessing’s
Tara Brooke
Here is a recipe that the men in your life will love and could possibly get you that “RING”
Apparently this recipe has help over 60 couple get engaged maybe your next! Here is the complete meal. If it happens to you please share your story! [READ MORE]
Hi Ladies,
Okay I want to talk about this issue because this can be one of the most important things you decide. I have many people in my life that I know and have watched make the same mistake over and over again and the one thing that they have in common is that all these women have allowed sweet time to be taken from them. [READ MORE]
